Thursday, January 3, 2013

f e a r

FEAR.  just looking at this seemingly innocuous word stirs anxiety and uneasiness in me.  fear is like a cold chill that silently seeps into the secret crevices of your heart, soul, and mind, and fogs your memory of what hope is like... warmth feels like.  it paralyzes you.  don't believe me?  how many times has fear stopped you from taking a risk?  how many times has fear caused you to stay in the same place because of not knowing the unknown? 

lately, a fear has settled in.  i've tried to sweep it out the doorstep of my heart.  i've tried to douse it with laughter.  i've tried to clamp its mouth shut.  but the fear has made itself comfortable, and promises me things like safety and entitlement. 

i am fighting. 

JOY has been standing outside my door asking to come in.   but the guard dog barks viciously when i try to let Her in.

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